But truth, cher ami, is a colossal bore.
- narrator, Camus' The Fall
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LEST I AM JUDGED FOR THIS
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    dear reader/listener/viewer/enjoyer/co-conspirator:
    lest i be judged for it, i inform you now that this project continues to be a scratch pad, a space for experimentation

    in other words, enjoy what you find here, and feel free to participate, but try not to take anything personal, and don't believe that this project presents an accurate view of me or my life

    this is a window, certainly, but one that hasn't been cleaned in quite some time

    your view may be foggy, obscure...you may see things that aren't really there...

    --harold

    want some background music?
    please consider downloading my most recent music podcast.

    and yes, i love my mom and my dad;
    they've always been good to me, no matter what impression you may have received here

    they never locked me in a cellar or anything
     
    highlighted post from the archives: me rambling about a new job (from two years ago)
    i recently messed with the archives, so they may not work correctly, but you may take your chances:
    December 2002 January 2003 February 2003 April 2003 May 2003 June 2003 July 2003 August 2003 September 2003 October 2003 November 2003 December 2003 January 2004 February 2004 March 2004 April 2004 May 2004 June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 November 2007 February 2008 March 2008 May 2008

    i once was an active member of the

    association of music podcasting

    musicpodcasting.org

    along with these fine music podcasters:

    all florida indies - bing futch
    audio gumshoe - rich palmer
    audio popcorn - krash coarse
    aural icebergs music cast - tiffany rapplean
    capital rock show - bucket aka jason
    darkhorse radio - alan carr
    ears to hear - jill lawton
    eclectic mix - george l smyth
    homegrown podcast - nic treadwell
    indiefeed - chris macdonald
    le jazz affair - sal calfa
    rubyfruit radio - heather smith
    sober cafe podcast - gracie hollombe
    sundown lounge - larry winfield
    tempo of the down - harold (that's me!)
    the darkcompass podcast - rowland cutler
    the fabrications podcast - matt macfarlane
    the phill(er) - phill ramey
    the radiozoom podcast - john bollwitt
    thepillarcast.com - jon tucker
    uc radio podshow - michael yusi
    zaldor's world - les zaldor

    ¡the text on this blog wants to leap out of its borders!

    this is...

    something that happened

    somethingthathappened.com
    		stories by harold j. johnson, in various formats - including text, audio, video, and podcasts
     
     
    Monday, May 28, 2007  

    Been considering producing a "show" for a 'Net radio station/website, but I have to admit I have some insecurities about the deal. What attracted me to the site, I believe, was a combination of timing and potential: A fellow joined my 'Net radio forum, immediately spamming the group with information regarding his talk radio station. In his post, he also put out a notice that his station was looking to fill a variety of time slots. I took the bait, visiting the site and listening to its programming a bit. Though the site looked a bit amateur-ish, it had some potential, and the show I first listened to had a host with a great voice for radio; the host also seemed to understand how to entertain (rather than bore) his audience.



    So I think it was that first night, while listening to that first show, that I first began to consider the possibility of joining the station. You know me (or perhaps you don't, if this is your first time visiting/reading this site of mine) -- I'm always producing podcasts and all kinds of other digital media for the Internet. First it was my live broadcasts on Live365 (which ultimately led to my project VoyagerRadio). Then it was my series of podcasts presented here on something that happened. Then it was my music podcast Tempo of the Down, which I'll (cross my fingers) soon be producing again. Then, it was video, which I've still a mind to produce, though I'm focusing more of my efforts on producing audio more regularly again.



    It was natural for me to be attracted to the idea of producing live 'Net radio again. So I began making plans, in my own mind, to make an effort toward achieving that goal. I made contacts with the hosts of the shows I had listened to on the station. I let them know I was interested in hosting my own show. I disappeared for a week or two, forgetting about the station, then returned and began listening more regularly. I feared I was beginning to become an annoyance, but then realized (due to the silence within their online forums) that I was possibly their best listener -- certainly the most motivated to participate within their community.



    Then I went on vacation, and didn't listen to the station for another couple of weeks. After "tuning in" again for about a week or so, I finally decided it was time to seriously consider producing my own show. So I contacted the main guy behind the station -- the Program Director, he might be, I don't know -- and let him know I was ready to produce a show. I pitched my idea, he welcomed it, and tonight (Memorial Day Monday) I'm supposed to go live for one hour, 10 p.m. Eastern.



    Well. The insecurities, or something akin to that, must have begun kicking in sometime mid-week, really taking hold this weekend. Part of me wants to plunge in and do the best damn show I can produce. The other part of me wants to run. I don't know what it is, exactly -- it seems I'm already looking for flaws within the system, reasons not to maintain my commitment. I've begun posting inflammatory remarks in the station's forums; I've begun feeling defensive toward any remark remotely sarcastic. In a word (or a few, really), I'm looking for a way out.



    Yet: I don't want to quit -- not unless the guys turn out to be a bunch of jerks. They seem alright, though, for a bunch of egotistic wanna-be broadcasters. I suspect they may need to get over themselves a bit, but I have to admit that it's just possible their confidence turns me off simply because I possess so little of it these days. Perhaps if I stick with it, this will be good for my recovery. So I think I'm going to give it a shot.



    Stay tuned.
     5/28/2007 01:30:00 AM (5) comments





    Tuesday, May 22, 2007  



    I'm not your typical gamer, but this preview of Starcraft II has got me excited...

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    Crazy Love, a film I will be enjoying soon.

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    5/22/2007 06:49:00 AM (0) comments





    Sunday, May 20, 2007  

    Money. "Money money money mo-ney...money!!!" Aargh, it's the root. Of all evil. Nothing new to tell you there. But sometimes you feel it more than at other times. I mean, really feel it. Like when you're behind on your rent. Well, I suppose it doesn't feel like the root of all evil when the rent's due, but it sure doesn't feel nice. It feels mean. (Though my landlords are nice, they fix my locks, so it's not like they're mean or anything, they simply seem to forget to perform some maintenance from time to time, and they don't screen prospective tenants very well...but I digress.)



    Lemme start over. Money feels like it's the root of all evil when you want to visit your mom but can't because you don't have enough money to pay the rent, let alone the transportation and meal expenses for the day spent with The Woman Who Gave Birth To You. But that's bullshit, you realize, when you think of the money you spent on that expensive computer part last month. Was your mom in your thoughts when you PayPal'ed that money to that eBay seller, dude? Evil is when your mind is consumed with guilt, shame, sadness, and pain due to your lack of a clams, your inability to horde the coinage.

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    5/20/2007 08:16:00 PM (0) comments





    Saturday, May 19, 2007  

    Man, now what do I do? I needed the money (for rent) desperately, so I sold an expensive computer component on eBay to some dude in Australia, and now he's telling me the part isn't working in his Mac. Great. Just swell. I know this part worked perfectly when I sent it out last week. 5/19/2007 10:25:00 PM (0) comments





     

    E62, Part Six: Wow, it's 8 o'clock *in the morning* and I'm sitting
    outside one of my favorite places; in fifteen minutes there will be a
    meeting for drunks here, one that I am destined to attend. Three
    meeting in less than 24 hours! (Four in 36!) That's *got* to be a
    new record, or approaching one...

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    5/19/2007 08:04:00 AM (0) comments





    Friday, May 18, 2007  

    E62, Part Five: Still feeling shaky after the AA meeting; I'm
    thinking I might go to another this evening, perhaps the men's stag
    meeting nearby. I feel like I need that meeting or something.
    Perhaps any will do, but I sense that it will be a good meeting to
    attend. It's like I simply didn't get enough from attending one
    meeting today, or this past week.

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    5/18/2007 06:42:00 PM (0) comments





     

    E62, Part Four: Another day, and let's make it to another meeting (or
    Meeting, with a capital M). Two days in a row, why not? Today has
    been a restful day for this has-been, a day spent watching a
    documentary about Starbucks. (How's that for a sober experience?) A
    restful day, for the most part, though the mind is always restless. A
    day on a path unlikely to lead to a bar then jail or a car crash. A
    decent day, you could say, though some of my obsessions are still
    getting the best of me.

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    5/18/2007 05:21:00 PM (0) comments





     

    E62, Part Three: Seems I'm posting about sobriety, or living sober,
    alot lately. Well, that is a big part of my life right now, trying to
    live without alcohol or pills or any other mind-altering substance
    (besides caffeine). That's just the way it is; I've got to maintain.
    Otherwise, I'm just floating out there, not doing much living. Not
    healthy living, anyway. So that's that -- death or life, and I'm
    choosing life, for the most part. Still have to cut this (renewed)
    smoking habit.

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    5/18/2007 10:43:00 AM (0) comments





    Thursday, May 17, 2007  

    E62, Part Two: So now I return to my 12-Step meeting, an afternoon
    group with an interesting format. I haven't gone to this meeting for
    a week. It feels good to be typing this. Soothing. I wait across
    the street, bitter aftertaste of a cigarette in my mouth, anticipating
    the serenity that will come from the occasion.

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    5/17/2007 05:26:00 PM (0) comments





    Wednesday, May 16, 2007  

    Dreamed about The Boys this afternoon, those two small dogs I lived with as a teenager. They were hangin' with me, at the store -- a supermarket, probably -- and as always, I was having difficulty keeping them from running away. I sensed they'd come back; I seemed to know they'd return. But still, there was the sense of anxiety over the possibility of them getting run over or something.



    I hugged and kissed those dogs to annoyance...


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    5/16/2007 08:16:00 PM (0) comments





    Monday, May 14, 2007  

    E62, Part One: Find myself in serious jeopardy, missing a meeting --
    and for what? A cup of coffee I don't need and an excuse? (Yes, I
    need to do homework, but isn't my recovery more important?) Well,
    tomorrow I'll surely make a meeting...

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    5/14/2007 05:44:00 PM (0) comments





     

    I intend to blog from my phone, a Nokia E62. So here's my first post,
    which I'm sending to go@blogger.com. From there, Blogger will convert
    my email into a blog, and then I will claim that blog. Once claimed,
    I will integrate the blog into my existing blog. By the time you read
    this post, the blog may already be integrated.

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    5/14/2007 02:20:00 PM (0) comments





     
     

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